how to build stairs:

goodnights | 10.2008

...

1o. how to build stairs:

its a life task.

you start once you realize you need them.

right after you learn you'll never fly.

(when i learned i could never fly, i felt like i had been and then suddenly fell.)

you start unknowing of what to use.

feathers were my first choice. bad choice. i kept faltering. like that dream i had...

then leaves. but i stopped to wander too often.

glass ones too. but i broke them once, and people saw.

9. my window is open. this is beautiful. because my home in LA was too old, most of the windows didn't open. it was awful. but this window opens, and i am right next to it. and i sleep with it open and it makes the blankets useful. i love it so much.

8. 2 minutes ago a man in a nearby apartment was laughing hysterically. he was laughing so hard and with so much sincerity i started to laugh. it was ridiculous.

7. i got to talk to a good friend of mine for a long while this evening. why i love our conversation: because they move from point to point to point to point and they never bore me. its always interesting. i am so blessed to have a life overflowing with incredible humans who are always engaging me in thought and contemplation. thanks kamruz!

6. tonight i watched arrested development for the first time. o.wow! this show is amazing!

it really does take me longer with the good ones...

5. another way to measure my life:

time it takes to realize the good ones, examples: broken social scene, ray lamontagne, fleet foxes, arrested development, metric, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind....

4. i get to go home this weekend! i miss my lovelies!

3. i learned my first life lesson for this chapter, and its so embarrassing i don't want to share it on the world wide web. but, lesson learned.

2. 5 paragraph essay in french: not as bad as i thought. still pretty bad though.  must start to think in french. je dois commencer à penser en français. je devrais écrire un blog en français!

1. things i've done that really confirm this new chapter:

sang 5 karaoke songs in front of people i know. this is harder than in front of strangers.

made some friends.

bike everywhere.

make decisions without telling anyone.

cook lots.

life is soooo good. geez.

love.

tuning:

there is a specific playlist right now:

Autumn

Jolene - Ray LaMontange

Your Protector - Fleet Foxes

Between the Bars - Elliott Smith

Skinny Love - Bon Iver

Passing Beauty - Kelsey Bulkin

Mykonos - Fleet Foxes

Be Here Now - Ray LaMontange

Grapevine Fires - Death Cab for Cutie

Pink Moon - Nick Drake

Backyards - Broken Social Scene

Empty - Ray LaMontagne

He Woke Me Up Again - Sufjan Stevens

String Quartet No. 16 in F, Op. 135 - Beethoven

English House - Fleet Foxes

The Penalty - Beirut

(exhale)

love. serious love.